Sunday, March 09, 2008

New Life

3 weeks have come and gone since I came back to old boring Adelaide. When I boarded the plane at the Penang International Airport (PIA) alone for the first time, I thought, "Damn!! I'm turning 20 this year, it's time to grow up and face the harsh reality of life!" Well, although I boarded the plane alone when I went home, it was different because I knew I was going back to the place where my parents shower me with love whereas this time, I'm leaving for a place where I have to be independent in taking care of things myself whilst juggling with studies. I so wanted to cry but I held back the tears, thinking that I must NOT break my new year resolution!! As I said before, I'm a very confused girl. I feel like I'm living 2 lives now - 1 in Adelaide and the other 1 in Penang. Everytime when I start to get used to things, I have to leave for the other place. Only then I realised that I'm the kind of person who doesn't like changes. I get stressed and depressed for sometime before getting used to things. =(

So, before I came back to Adelaide during the summer, I planned to move out of my hostel. The reasons are:
  1. I'm sick of the hostel food and seriously the manager is over charging us (at least i save some money when I move out)
  2. I wanna be more independent - both in life and entertainment. In the aspect of life, I guess I wanna learn some living skills such as cooking and managing a place; in entertainment sense, I don't wanna always depend on other people for entertainment, you know, cause I used to crash my hostel mates' rooms so often that sometimes I just can't sit still and finish my assignment! XP
  3. Moving to the city equals no more 30-35 mins bus rides to the city.
  4. Thinking of working in the city...see how it goes =)
Anyway, at this exact moment as I'm typing this, my housemate, J, has gone out to a friend's birthday party and I'm alone. So lonely. I feel so helpless when I can't sms my best friend or my parents because I've exceeded my credit limit!! >.< This makes me realise that I'm the kind of person who is afraid of being alone!!

What a crappy post...anyway, will update when I'm in a better mood...hope I don't get depressed anytime soon. =S



genieve said...

so u have moved out>?

wow, to where?
keep me updated girl!

take care.

Sue said...

heyhey....this is the first time i leave comment in your blog eh?!
you sound so depressed there...although i can't be there with you, but i really hope that you'll be strong and not vulnerable to all kind of stuff that used to hurt you.
i miss the care-free Ee Lin!!! :p
help me to find her back....

Lin said...

genieve: yeah, i've moved to the city...tobin house, opp state library =) u take care too ya!

sue: i hate u!! the moment i finished reading ur comment, i cried. =( it's so hard to b care free here when i have to take care of so many things my own...i miss everyone...i keep dreaming of ppl in pg, but i'll try...=) thanks...*hugs*

YingXiang said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
YingXiang said...

did you dream of me? did you dream of me?

take care, sweetheart, and don't cry again. (hugs hugs and plants wet wet pecks on you)

be strong, don't let the nasty emotions rule you! you can do better than that!

sure it's hard going from being dependent on our mummies to taking care about everything in our lives now that we're out here, but we need to go through it no?

just think: there are so many who went through this and came out fine, surely we can at least grow into an adult in one piece right? right?

muaks, have faith that there'll always be a beautiful tomorrow.

Here Comes the Rain by A1

here comes the rain
no need to hide
i know the sunshine's on the other side
won't let the storm roll over me
tear down these walls once and for all and set me free
here comes the rain

I love this song. very enheartening.

Lin said...

awwww...thanks so much ying xiang!! =') i couldn't help but tear...AGAIN when i read ur comment. oh well, yeah, i guess u're right...but u know, i never thought that it'd be time to grow up so soon! i miss u guys!!