怎么样才能够停止对一个人的思念？

一眼之念 一念执著
注定就此飞蛾扑火
明知是祸 为何还不知所措
最好不见 最好不念
如此才可不与你相恋
多一步的擦肩
就步步沦陷

是时间的过错
让我们只能错过
我多想念 你多遥远
早知道是苦果
这一刻也不想逃脱
可惜这字眼太刺眼
两个世界之后
只好 情深 缘浅

你有没有试过想一个人想到胸口好闷，好像快爆炸那样？说真的，这感觉还是前所未有。我到底怎么了？！啊！！！张依灵，醒醒吧！

So near yet so far

If you read my previous post, you would know by now that I have a major crush on this guy called Kurt. The thing is we do not know each other. Uh huh. I know it sounds totally insane but I feel so sad that he hasn't approved my friend request on Facebook! I saw him appear on my news feed this morning - "Kurt is now friends with ____ & 10 others." o.O I'm probably buried under 100s or 1000s of friend requests... Oh well...

But...for the past few days, I've been checking out his friend, Sam, on YouTube and his myspace page. On first look, you'll find that he's not cute but as you see him sing/act, there's this something about him that makes you feel attracted to him. Charm, maybe? LOL Kurt, Sam & many others are filming a movie called College Musical this winter (their summer) and are asking on Facebook if anyone wants to help out or simply be an extra. *SIGH* Hence, the post title. If only I could fly myself to the US, not worry about my thesis...I sooo wanna be a part of their movie production! I'm sure it would be an awesome experience & at the same time I'd get to fulfill my dream of becoming an extra. XD

I've been listening to the songs covered by Sam (produced by Kurt) 24/7, when I'm doing my thesis. Hehe...it almost feels like he's singing right next to me. *slaps self* Wake up already!

This is a video of Kurt playing "Baby" on the recorder. He produces all his videos on YouTube. He occasionally appears in videos with Sam & his other friends, playing musical instruments and/or being vocal backups [gosh, is there even such a word - vocal backup].

This is Sam & his clones...LOL (produced by Kurt) Totally LOVE this cover of "Don't stop believing"! Enjoy!

XOXO,

Me

Young & in love

I know my post title may be misleading...LOL I'm not young & in love but it has got to do with being young & in love. Get it?? XD

Logged onto facebook first thing in the morning (not really, just after breakfast & cleaning the house), & I came across this video my friend posted up.

While watching it, it reminded me of my primary & high school days. Those were the days when I would immerse in this romantic fantasy of mine. LOL I've always dreamt that one day I'll have my own love story - "You'll be the prince & I'll be the princess, it's a love story, baby just say yes". When we were young, everything seemed hopeful, the future was uncertain but we were all excited about going to uni, making new friends, experiencing different cultures etc. In short, we were so carefree. If you meet a guy you like, love is all it takes. As long as you love one another, everything will work out right? However, now that I've grown older (hopefully wiser too), I realised that you can't live on love alone. Well at least I know I can't. Just like a chinese saying goes 爱情和面包，你选哪一个？*translated - love & bread, which one would you choose?* I'd definitely choose bread! As if love will keep me fed & warm. What if the guy I like is like super duper poor? =/ I'm also not implying that I want a rich guy...LOL It's just that when we become more mature, we'll take many factors into consideration, eg. is he financially stable? Would he be a great father to my children?

Sometimes I catch a glimpse of an extremely cute guy on the street, but guess what? Most of them are still in high school! ='( I'm old...really getting old...Before you think that I like young boys, let me tell you my tragic "love story". HAHAHAHAHA I was working with this guy called R on my research project & I really liked him because he was nice, friendly & all. Really liked his bubbly & funny personality. But...that feeling soon turned into mixed feelings because...he was engaged! ='(( Boohoo! He's getting married on the 10th of July. Ahhhhhhh! Why is it that I always fall for someone who's either taken or, worse, getting married?!!?

After finding out his relationship status, I felt SUPER nervous working alongside him after that. I kept feeling conscious about my actions, just in case he finds out that I actually have a crush on him then he had to make a difficult decision whether he should leave his fiancee for me. LOL Just kidding about the latter part. So, I'm not "actively" searching for the other half...wayyy too busy with my studies to even think about it. Gosh, I'm starting to ramble about how miserable my love life is. Please don't misunderstand. I'm happy with my status right now!

Why hasn't R invited me to his wedding?!?!?!?!

OK, fine...I AM happy! ^^

p/s: Oh, watch the video...it's so sweet! *melts*

XOXO,

Me

Lately...

...I've been feeling like a pregnant woman. Literally. I've been eating non-stop every day even though I'm not hungry. I keep craving for junk food & I can never get enough! Good thing I don't really have junk food at home so I just pig away on whatever I have. Well, at first it was the time of the month but it's over now. =S Also, I've become a person of few words. Most of the time I try not to open my mouth to talk because I'm just not in the mood to. =(

On another note, I'm hooked to a song sung by 神目与瞳. I've been listening to it on repeat for 24 hours...I just love love love the duet effect & the sadness of the song. I heard KT sing it a few times during our karaoke sessions & I kept forgetting the name of the artist but I stumbled upon it a few days ago.

This is the video...nothing much about the video but listen to the song!!

XOXO,

Me

I know...

...I've been updating my blog so often lately.

I guess because lately I've been experiencing a whirlwind of emotions. LOL

Today's weather is just perfect although still chilly. At least the sun has finally decided to show itself.

Assignment is in good progress too I must say because I keep scaring myself with other deadlines & so I'm forced to just type & type although I haven't organised my thoughts well. I can always modify my essay when I'm done. =)

This friend of mine, who is totally pro-Korean has recommended my friends & I heaps of Korean songs. I must say that they're really good & I'm hooked to many of them. Even play them repeatedly every day. A few days ago I was totally unmotivated to do anything, so I learnt how to sing part of a Korean song. XD

For the past few days, I really wanna thank God that He has blessed me with so much in life! Although sometimes I feel like giving up, He's just this little voice in me that tells me that I can do it & that everything will be OK because nothing can ever happen to me without His permission. He also blessed me with good friends whom I can talk to when I'm in need, friends who don't pass judgments. Since first year of uni, He has blessed me with E in my life. It must be His plan to have her in my life, because she's a great sister in Christ! Thanks to her, I renewed my faith. How I miss the days in Hosanna...when we would pray for each other, especially during exam period.

Ah..I have too much on my mind & I'm not really good with words so I'll leave this post as it is. =)

This is the song I'm totally addicted to.

Though the tune sounds so happy & lively, the lyrics is a bit sad...kinda. Enjoy!

XOXO,
Me

Crazy weather

Ahh...The weather these days is just so unpredictable to the extent that it's predictable!!! It's been raining a lot these days, which is rather rare for SA since SA is the driest continent (or state...whatever!). Well, SA needs rain but I hate it! It's killing me. The cold & the gloomy skies. Did I mention the cold?! Yes, For the first time in my life, I actually had my laptop sitting my lap while I do my work & facebook-ing because I just wanna hide under the covers to keep myself warm!

It's driving me crazy, the weather I mean. It rains for half an hour & then the sun greets me with its rays streaming in my window, then it bids me goodby again followed by the gloomy skies & pouring rain. *SIGH* Please come back to me...You know I love you, you know I do. I'm so sorry for not appreciating you but now I know how important you are to me. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine...you make me happy when skies are gray! ='(

There it goes again..the sun is up but I shall not rejoice too early just in case it decides to play hide-&-seek with me again. There goes my 2 weeks of teaching break. Uni is supposed to start today but today I don't have practical so I get a day off, which means I need to use the time for my assignment. Argh!

Currently listening to Come Back To Me by Utada Hikaru, recommended by YL. & it totally suits the weather right now. LOL the 1st part of the lyrics go like this: -

The rain falls on my windows
And the coldness runs through my soul
And the rain falls, oh the rain falls
I don't want to be alone

Time to fix myself some lunch & then gotta get to work! =(

XOXO,
Me

My latest obsession

Ahhhh! I feel like a high school student all over again! =P After KT intro-ed to me this korean version of Meteor Garden, I totally got hooked to it! The guys (except for 1) are soooooooo cute! & I thought I was over all these korean craze. Boy, I was wrong. I can never grow out of it! Oh yeah, it's called Boys Over Flowers / Boys Before Flowers. So far, the korean version is the best! =P

I've only watched like 3 episodes because I dare not download too much in case my internet quota finishes before end of the month! Plus, I have work to do so I can't possibly get myself MORE hooked to it! *sigh* Gonna get the complete series from a friend who has it! But...=( Don't think I'll watch it until I finish all my assignments at the end of May.

p/s: If only high school was this happening! *screams* LOL

Here's some eye candy! ;P

Not forgetting the soundtrack! It's called Because I'm Stupid. I've been playing this song for over a 100 times in a day! The song is just so sad...it's sung by the guy on the far right in the pic above & his group. =)



He's the guy in the middle in the video!

XOXO,
Me

My assignments...

...are so yesterday!! XP I don't care that exams are just around the corner, I'd prefer studying to doing assignments ANYTIME!!

So here's a song I dedicate to myself...LOL






XOXO,
Me

Something to tickle your funny bone!

Seriously, when I watched this, my face was like this -> =.="'

Laugh die me!




This is Mariah Carey's reaction when she watched the clip.




The improved version, enjoy! =P




p/s: Hopefully the videos made ur day juz like how they made mine! =)

XOXO,
Me

It's times like these...

...that we need to turn to Him more!
Been studying non-stop (with occasional breaks in between) & now when I step into my room and see my desk, I feel like throwing up...
I'm sick of books already...
When will this all end?!

Went to church today, and during Praise & Worship session, I nearly cried while singing this song.
I've been striving so hard to do well in my exams that sometimes I forget His faithfulness to me, leaving Him out of my life & letting Him in during good times!
So, now, I just need to do my best and leave the rest to Him!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After lunch, I got a phone call from a friend whom I had a same class with last year. She asked me tips on exams as she's taking a subject that I took last year. After catching up a little, she asked me if I've seen Emma (another girl in our class) around. Apparently, last year she had cancer...was juz initial stage and she tried calling her last few months but no one picked up. I was quite taken aback actually...never thought that someone you have contact with would have cancer. It's quite unbelievable if you ask me. Made me think of Karen Cheng, whom her husband had cancer and survived it and now living a very fulfilling life with her and kids!! Really makes you think twice on how you wanna spend your lifetime eh?

So, here's the song I wanna share with all my readers! Enjoy! ;)


XOXO,
Me

Beautiful Girls

I just LOVE LOVE LOVE this version of Beautiful Girls by Jojo!!

Taking a break from studying

Came across this song while taking a break from studying.
Enjoy! ;)

Mariah Carey - Bye Bye
This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandmothers
Lift your head to the sky 'cause we will never say bye

As a child there were them times
I didn't get it but you kept me in line
I didn't know why you didn't show up sometimes
It's something more than saying "I miss you"
But when we talked too
All them grown folk things
Separation brings
You never let me know it
You never let it show because
You loved me and obviously
There's so much more left to say
If you were with me today face to face

[Chorus:]
I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
"I wish I could talk to you for awhile"
"I wish I could find a way try not to cry"
As time goes by
And soon as you reach a better place
Still I'll give the whole world to see your face
And I'm right here next to you
It feels like you gone too soon
The hardest thing to do is say bye bye

(Bye Bye [3x])
Bye bye

And you never got the chance to see how good I've done
And you never got to see me back at number one
I wish that you were here to celebrate together
I wish that we could spend the holidays together

I remember when you used to tuck me in at night
With the Teddy Bear you gave to me that I held so tight
I thought you were so strong
That you can make it through whatever
It's so hard to accept the fact you're gone forever

[Chorus]

(bye bye bye bye bye bye [3x])
Bye bye

This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandfather
Lift your head to the sky 'cause we will never say bye

[Chorus]